


(every night) in my dreams

by badasskorra



Category: Runaways (TV 2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-10
Updated: 2018-11-10
Packaged: 2019-08-21 13:53:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16577771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/badasskorra/pseuds/badasskorra
Summary: karolina wakes up crying one night; doesn’t remember the dream, doesn’t know why.that’s how it starts.(she’s six.)





	(every night) in my dreams

**Author's Note:**

> hello hav this sort of rushed thing i wrote when im supposed to be studying for cae
> 
> (maybe one day when i actually have time i can write something more elaborate)
> 
> oh n heres [this playlist](https://open.spotify.com/user/softday6/playlist/71Ds6hAYWONahM9Sk8RqH5?si=KJUm9zjwT7GscW6QZpSskw) i made like a yr ago if you wanna

karolina wakes up crying one night; doesn’t remember the dream, doesn’t know why.

that’s how it starts.

(she’s six.)

 

*

 

the first time karolina sees the girl is the first time she remembers the dream.

she’s eight.

(the girl is beautiful. karolina can’t see her clearly but she _knows_. she knows she is.)

 

*

 

“mom, what’s a soulmate?”

“some people like to believe we all have a person who’s destined to be with us. our other half, as they say. but there’s no such thing, sweetheart.”

 

*

 

the first thing karolina notices is the gentle breeze, blowing the girl’s long dark hair. she has her eyes closed, basking in the warm sunlight. she _is_ beautiful.

even more than that, and something in karolina itches to _touch_ , to _feel_ , to make sure she’s not just a mirage but another part of her says _don’t_ because what if she isn’t? what if she disappears?

they’re sitting in a garden, karolina belatedly reliases. there are hundreds of flowers, all different types and different colors, all she’s never seen before, and yet none compare to the beauty of the girl sitting next to her.

(karolina doesn’t ask for her name, for fear of disturbing the peaceful silence; but just before she wakes up she sees the golden crown residing on the girl’s head.)

 

*

 

karolina falls asleep in class. the first time accidentally, unlike the other three.

she doesn’t get to see the girl; there are no dreams.

 

*

 

karolina is walking on a busy street, everything around her a flurry of bright colors. people rushing to and from work, merchants offering the best from the best, children running and laughing, one of them almost knocking karolina down had it not been for the unexpected hand on the small of her back.

(her skin burns, where the hand was not even a second ago.)

the girl is laughing, too, saying something barely audible and even when karolina strains her ears she still can’t decipher the words. but that’s okay, she thinks. she got to see the girl’s smile. that’s enough.

then, the girl is offering her her hand and- oh.

“karolina.”

she can’t hear her own voice, either.

(it’s not until she wakes up, later, that karolina wonders how she can picture renaissance florence with such clarity despite having never been there. she writes it off to watching that da vinci documentary before going to bed.)

 

*

 

karolina stops asking her mother about the dreams.

instead, she goes to the library.

(and if she tries to spot the girl on the way, well, no one can blame her.)

 

*

 

the first time karolina hears the girl’s voice is the first time she hears somebody who isn’t her parents tell her they love her.

from what she can gather, they’re in a hotel room, loud music blaring outside, mixing with the shouts of joy and laughter from the city’s residents. it’s the middle of some summer festival, she guesses.

the girl’s voice draws her attention away from the fireworks beyond their windows. she’s just asking what to wear, nothing of significance. karolina’s eyes are wide all the same, her mouth hanging open.

her voice is just as beautiful as the rest of her.

(karolina finds it’s even more beautiful saying her name, her breath ghosting over karolina’s lips, saying _i love you_.)

 

*

 

karolina thought she saw her, once. she chased after the shadow for three blocks and then–

nothing.

(she keeps looking.)

 

*

 

they meet at a ball, this time.

(this life, she’s gathered that much.)

her parents are having a conversation about politics with some other snobby family which karolina has no interest in, and she jumps at the first chance to get away.

which, as it turns, is when the dances begin.

karolina offers her hand to the first man she sees (and silently thanks him when he doesn’t pretest considering they haven’t been formally introduced) – he’s young and handsome, light brown hair falling into his eyes, and karolina can’t help but think of the man she’s arranged to marry the following year.

she looks away.

all the swirling and spinning almost makes her dizzy, but that’s not the reason she suddenly stops dancing, no.

karolina felt a pair of eyes following her from the moment she took the man’s hand all throughout their dancing and still, she feels them now. she thought it was a family member disapproving her negligence to proper etiquette but looking at those captivating dark eyes, she’s proven wrong.

her dancing partner calls for her, as karolina takes her leave, but it sounds only like distant chatter to her.

when karolina reaches her, the girl doesn’t say anything – just smiles and takes karolina’s hand.

 

*

 

(there are some dreams where she doesn’t see the girl; where she’s just wandering alone in the nothingness.

she hates those.

they feel too real.

and she’s going to find her. she _will_.)

 

*

 

there is a war. karolina doesn’t know which, doesn’t _care_.

she cares only for the girl currently in her arms. she is stroking karolina’s hair, saying something karolina doesn’t bother to listen to because they’re running out of time.

the girl’s bright eyes are losing their spark with each second and would she just listen, plea _se, stop talking, save your breath, please, please_ –

blinded by her loss and rage, karolina loses track of what’s going on; feels like an outsider just watching on in her own body.

that day – life – is the first time karolina takes lives.

it’s a whole massacre. she doesn’t count how many she’s killed. doesn’t _want_ to count.

(this is the second time karolina wakes up crying. she wishes she didn’t remember why.)

 

_we’ll see each other again. i promise._

*

 

they’re lying in a field. nothing but greenery for miles and miles. the girl is weaving a flower crown, muttering something under her breath as if just yesterday she wasn’t a lifeless corpse, covered in blood and karolina’s tears.

and karolina can’t help it, not after the last dream. she throws her arms around the girl, crushing the flowers between their bodies. any other time she would’ve minded but she doesn’t because she’s here, she’s he _re, she’s here_.

and she must know too, she _must_ , because the girl is laughing, pulling away only to close the gap between their lips and kiss her, and even then she’s still smiling.

then–

“nico! nico, where are you? young lady, you know how important education is, you can’t just run off whenever you like!”

and they’re laughing again, and laughing still when a woman appears and drags _nico_ away.

(karolina is twenty-three when she finally learns the girl’s name.)

 

*

 

years pass.

karolina still hasn’t found her.

(she’s not giving up, not _now_ , not ever.)

 

*

 

a painter and a model.

a singer and a stage technician.

a princess and her maid.

a primary teacher and an office worker.

a journalist and a revolutionary.

countless lives, countless meetings.

and only two constants in all of them.

 

*

 

she meets lots of girls in her lifetime; dates some of them, kisses a few, _almost_ loves two but–

all of them so beautiful, so kind, and yet–  

it’s never enough. none of them are _her_.

 

*

 

 

the first _night_ she doesn’t dream, she’s eighty.

karolina goes to sleep.

doesn’t wake up.

(that’s how it ends.)

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

this is how it begins– 

 

 

 

 

 

“karolina, sweetheart, hurry up or we’re going to be late!” she hears her mother call from downstairs.

“coming!”

karolina puts on her favorite pink ribbon and leaves her room.

she’s silent for most of the car ride until they near the wilder mansion, and something prompts her to speak. “are they nice?”

“who, kar?” her father asks absentmindedly, still focused on the road.

fiddling with her dress, she mumbles, “the other kids.”

her mother turns into her seat to smile at her sympathetically and pat her hand. “of course, sweetie. i’m sure you’ll become the best of friends, just like us.”

 

as its name suggests, the wilder home is huge, and would seems even more huge to karolina’s three feet ten self, had she not grown up in the church of gibborim.

a young boy, not much older than karolina herself, opens the door, surprising the newcomers. he grins and extends his hand towards karolina.

“hi! i’m alex.” the pair of glasses perched on his nose look as if they’ll fall off any moment, and karolina reaches out to fix them instead.

she smiles back, says, “i’m karolina.”

“where are your parents, alex?” her mother cuts in.

“they’re inside!” alex replies, voice still laced with enthusiasm, as if it’s christmas. karolina decides she likes him.

when alex’s mom leads them to the guesthouse, karolina realizes she’s not the first one to arrive, seeing as there are two other girls sitting inside already.

“we’re still waiting for gert and chase to come, but we can play mario kart if you guys wanna!”

karolina smiles, nodding, and goes to introduce herself to the girls.

except–

karolina stops dead in her tracks, when one of them looks up.

chubby cheeks, dark eyes, black hair tied up in a ponytail, the girl looks everything and nothing like a stranger karolina thinks she should be.

karolina’s never been to the wilders household before, has never seen this girl before, yet she feels a strange pull towards her – a pull her six-year-old mind can’t understand – as if she knows her.

then–

“oh, chase is here!”

and the moment is over, karolina reaches out, says, “hello, my name’s karolina.”

and the girl smiles back. “nico.”

 

 

 

(they’re sixteen and on the run. they’re wanted criminals, their parents are murderers, and nowhere is safe.

but finally, fin _ally, finally_ – they’re together. that’s all that matters.

they’re not okay, not yet. but they will be. they _will_ , karolina knows; like she would know nico always, with every face, in every lifetime.

because they’re the sun and moon, you see. one cannot be without the other.

if karolina is the sun –  the one that shines bright, the one that gives hope, then nico is the moon –  the one to shine when it’s darkest, the one that gives you a little push and helps you go on.)


End file.
